Avoid gossiping. 12. Polite conversation. George will like to hear about how the woodshed is coming along. This is a perfect way of showing continued mutual interest in each other. 5. Answers must be kept to the point so that the small chit chat is kept smooth and free flowing. Shutterstock/Motortion Films. Conversation is a Two-Way Street. Worrying too much about what you will say next can cause you to lose track of the conversation as it's happening. My hair is a mess!" Wow, is it getting late out. You rant about the war and then remember your friends boyfriend just returned from Iraq. I loved the pork tenderloin! If you find it difficult to think of something to say in response, try using some filler sentences, such as: Not only does that give you a bit of time to think about the subject under discussion, but its a compliment to the person youre speaking with, which is always good. F.ex: Julia: Ah, John, we were just discussing the new headquarters building. Small talk is, broadly, inconsequential chit-chat about minor or uncontentious issues such as the weather, recent news items or jobs. You know its time to end a conversation when: But if you really want to do it like the masters of conversation, you want to end it on the high note. Avoid swear words in polite company. This can boost your status, since you show you have friends. It may be an informal conversation with a friend or an acquaintance (someone you know, but not very well). The grocery store is closing soon, Ive got to make a run real quick!. 99% of the time, they wont stop you! 1 Even if you are uncomfortable, avoiding small talk all together only serves to worsen anxiety in the long run. Ive got another phone call in 10 minutes. But conversation is also a way to explore whether you wish to know someone better and build a relationship with them. Another thing I wanted to mention before I go is. Thanks! 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The clap is something I would avoid unless the other person cant stop talking! PTSD Among Ukrainian Civilians in the Russia-Ukraine War, Wolves With a Parasite Become More Daring, Study Shows, Teaching Teens to Help Prevent Child Sexual Abuse, Sensory Issues Often Have Overlooked Consequences, Teen Mothers: When Stigma Trumps Compassion (and Research), How Expressing Authentic Admiration Changes Relationships, Don't Read Your Bad Reviews: Part 3 of The Truth About Writing and Publishing, 5 Subtle Signs of Unprocessed Attachment Trauma, The 10 Best Predictors of a Bad Romantic Relationship, Feeling Stuck? I like my cats, but Im not terribly interested in yours, and cats are the only pets I like. If they are still talking, they may have a natural urge to sit down in their own chair. I try not to use this one because the other person might think youre copping out. Don't say: You didn't explain this point. The key is to make strong eye contact and say it in a sincere way. Your conversation ender is your last chance to change the overall feel of the conversation. Goodbye now, I have to go.. Retrieved from https://www.thoughtco.com/what-is-conversation-analysis-ca-p2-1689924. Very expensive wasnt it? Even if you know that what someone is saying is inaccurate, you should avoid telling them that they're "wrong." "No one likes being wrong, so that will shut a person down quickly," explains Stemen. No, unfortunately we go stuck in traffic. Do . The speaker will feel awkward. Dont ask what someone does and leave it at that. Refer subjects to those with knowledge. Next time, can you go over how to get my stuff back after walking away from them? Most foot-in-mouth moments occur because of a failure to think before speaking. But a much better rule is simply to tailor your conversation topics to those you are conversing with. Say the right thing, or say nothing.. The one-upper believes that his stories show his superiority; on the contrary, they reveal his naked insecurity. Weve all met the man who pours out his life story as soon as you meet him. Its been great!. This was very helpful! For instance, if someone invites you to do something and you want to decline their invitation nicely, you can say: I'd love to, but I can't. I have to get up early tomorrow morning. Extend your hand out and wait for them to accept it. You can build rapport by establishing some common ground and by simply smiling and using positive and reinforcing body language. Vanessa, this is some great information that I wished I knew many conferences ago! This one works on short conversations, so its probably not ideal to use when youve already been talking for an hour. may seem to be reasonable. My husband keeps making the deck larger so that I'll go further out into the yard. - yes thats right I moved there 3 years ago, - No actually Im from a little town to the east called Canterbury, Direct - How long are you here for? The person who contradicts, frequently restates the matter in another way.. Ask them if they have any plans either this weekend or after the event. Did my horrible exit ruin my graceful entrance? polite meaning: 1. behaving in a way that is socially correct and shows understanding of and care for other. Dont engage in one-upping. The one-upper not only makes a lousy friend, he also makes a highly annoying conversationalist. It can therefore be useful to understand how to use conversation to create and build emotional connections. Shes also into website development and works at one of the largest companies in LA! So, if you get a chance to make your point later on, dont air your annoyance with a petulant, As I was trying to say a little earlier. Polite Conversation "Speech, no doubt, is a valuable gift, but at the same time it is a gift that may be abused. Such admonitions as 'Skip the small talk,' 'Get to the point,' or 'Why don't you say what you mean?' We'll focus on your pronunciation, tone and natural expression so that you sound natural. Clapping once is a strong nonverbal way to say, Hey, its my turn to talk! You can also say something along the lines of Well, it was nice talking to you, but I have to go now! to soften the blow. Stop me if Ive told you this story before. If you dont know how to end a call, this technique is a safe bet. If youre at a networking event, both of you know times precious and youre both there to mingle. This is charisma. Politeness is the practical application of good manners or etiquette so as not to offend others. There are actually two forms of interrupting, as 1954s Esquire Etiquette explains: The obvious one, interrupting the speaker in mid-sentence, is easy to avoid: just wait until the other has stopped talking before you start. Thanks for the video call!. And heres the key: You have to exit, right? It is very unlikely and if it ever does happen remember you were the friendly one and the other person will be perceived as rude. "I want" sounds like a demand, as if you are commanding the other person to fulfill your desires. You are responsible for dealing with them and you must create a good impression but how do you entertain them and look after them ? "Goodbye". "Have a nice day". You can still email people today! Now one more thing. Shes won several architecture prizes. A reader wonders if there is a polite way to end political conversations after an uncomfortable taxi ride. A conversation is a group project, with each person weaving in a tidbit here and there. Why not take an, Understanding Legal Issues in Employment Law, The Etiquette Involved in Moments of Sorrow, Licensing and Certification Requirements Needed as an Interior Designer, The Effectiveness of Goals in Wellness Coaching, How to Outline and Organize Your Award Winning Speech. Our site uses cookies for general statistics, security, customization, and to assist in marketing efforts in accordance with our. Galimatias on vuonna 1996 perustettu valmennusyritys, jokatarjoaa palveluja yrityksille, organisaatioille ja julkishallinnolle. If you are right you look clever. A monologue, in either direction, is not conversation. Do not be untruthful, but also don't feel the need to be hurtful. And at the same time, you dont want to dig too deeply into the personal life of other people either. No single person should dominate the conversation, so keep your answers to the point. The key is sharing appropriate information. 1. Can You. Making Polite Requests in English with Examples. Smile and make the "time out" signal. Does the other person have something they are promoting? Whats the best way to make sure youre remembered? Ask those you converse with interesting and thoughtful questions. Indirect - So are you from London or ..? For example: "Good morning/afternoon/ evening". Do you have a LinkedIn account?. There are no grandchildren. On the way to a party or dinner, I think about the people I will be seeing that night and brainstorm stories I can tell and questions I can ask. "They do this because they understand that it may be uncomfortable for people . The environment you're in can offer many conversation starters. The person does not need to have won; you can congratulate the competitor on a job well done. 4. Thats really amazing! Can we talk later?, Is it late? Could You/Would You/Do You Think You Could. We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer) as we strive to provide site experiences for browsers that support new web standards and security practices. This is aggressive and too direct. These are all ways to say 'hello' and 'goodbye' in the workplace or a more formal situation. PostedMay 26, 2017 Either way, youve made your intention clear, and the why part can be left ambiguous. Mention that youre done with everything and also ask if everyone else is done. Being considerate of the other persons time shows your honesty and lets you both get on with your day. Don't say: I want a hamburger. I wil. A good set of noise-isolating headphones might work in your favor. I wish I had read this article and thought of these tips during that conversation. Best Polite Quotes. Warm-up Question: Are you a polite person? This game is developed by Joy Vendor a famous one known in puzzle games for ios and android devices. The key is to make strong eye contact and say it in a sincere way. Oh, theres my friend over there! It was going superbly! It looks like youve got a tight schedule ahead of you, Ill let you go for now.. Being Good Tempered, Subscribe to our Newsletter | Contact Us | About Us. It also potentially avoids a lot of awkward guesses if anyone else has something to contribute. Will You. Conversation Defined. For this reason, in conversation, they are often called invitations. Think of your conversation as a way of presenting both yourself and your organisation in a good light. If you have free time during lunch, you can plan to continue your lunch with your colleague without dismissing them altogether. Use phrases like: Oh No! When ending a phone conversation abruptly, the key is to mention that YOU will call back later, not them. Lets face it. Ian, youll know.. Ian: Yes, Hadid won the competition,. My name is X, Hello, you must be from Dinex. They can talk to anybody about anything in a laid-back, casual manner that sets people immediately at ease. Would You Mind/I Wonder If You Would Mind. Conversation analysis is a branch of sociology which studies the structure and organization of human interaction, with . It doesn't have to be this way. To avoid inadvertently touching on a sensitive spot, instead of asking someone about X, volunteer that information about yourself. Below, we provide some tips and guidelines as an introduction (or reminder) on properly engaging in conversation. Nice chatting with you! This explains why most people insisted we talk about five things and five things only: children, grandchildren, pets, sports, and gardening. Instead, try asking a question to establish common ground. You can even take this the other way. If you see someone youre familiar with, go after them! Ah no we have a meeting and then we will be meeting a supplier. Say: I'd like a hamburger. And forget about the supposedly gallant phrases like Allow me and After you. It is not etiquette to say things the long way or the fancy way. Debate is a competitive, two-way conversation. ; courteous; civil: a polite reply. Got a dazzling new business card you want to show off? DON'T SAY: Your design isn't good. Here are some examples of common email sign offs you can use: For more tips on how to craft a perfect professional email, read our guide here: 17 Professional Email Tips to Craft Your Next Email (With Templates!). When you are interrupted, the politest thing to do is the hardest thing: shut up. The best way to exit a conversation depends on your impact level.. Or: I'll have a hamburger, please. Id love to keep in touch! Rather than being scared of small talk, make a point of overcoming your fear of it. The SkillsYouNeed Guide to Interpersonal Skills. Did you get held up at the airport ? Its been great meeting you!. But whats next? Let me introduce you two.. Implement a deadline to the conversation so both of you have a few more minutes to wrap things up. And then it was time to say goodbye. But if you have to, its always an option. Dont talk to only one person when conversing in a group. ThoughtCo, Feb. 16, 2021, thoughtco.com/what-is-conversation-analysis-ca-p2-1689924. This is not simply a matter of whom you are physically conversing with you can also ice people out by choosing subjects on which they have no interest or knowledge, such as the intricacies of your job that only your co-worker understands and inside jokes and remember whens with your buddy. But since we need to exist in the world as social animals, what might neutral topics of conversation be? I value being fully present, so theyre behaviors I always thought of as rude or inconsiderate, and should be avoided. Its been so great talking to you. I should go now. Don't say: You don't understand me. Weeks worth, maybe? Read up on 5 more things you shouldnt bring up in conversation. Want to start taking action on the content you read on AoM? 1. Dont go back and finish a story dont excavate a buried point unless you are asked to do so. Its important to focus on the other person, and what theyre saying. 3. You eat. You'll get our 5 free 'One Minute Life Skills' and our weekly newsletter. Hi, Caroline! This might feel like an invitation to them that youve welcomed them to your own spacethen youd be stuck in a dead-end until they leave! On the downside, this also commits you to actually sitting down for a while, potentially making you miss out on some action or keeping you glued to the seating section. I Assure you. You can even send them a message after the event to reconnect with him or her! I have had far too many awkward closers and now I am excited to be more confident when closing interactions! 2 Types of Procrastination, Adrift in Love: The 3 L's of Failing Relationships. Youll learn something significant about someone's lifeand your life will be more interesting because of it. Its easy to think that the art of conversation is a skill that the gods bestow on a happy few, while cursing most men with turbid tongues. Before doing this strategy, make sure your LinkedIn profile is up-to-par. Or maybe even youve got a bad case of the runs. Similar to the video call conversation ender, except in phone call form! Great to meet you!. Some meetings can drag on and on, and even cause Zoom fatigue. If grammatical mistakes make the hair on the back of your neck stand up, you may find it difficult to restrain yourself from correcting the errors of others. Many foreigners feel uncomfortable when there is an awkward silence. "Conversation Defined." So, youve ended up here. I will be able to modify these graceful exit cues to my interactions with him as needed, and apply them to future situations as well. Its also a great opportunity to get to know their hobbies or what they like to do in their free time. Most of the time, theyll pick up on this cue. Comics know that time + pain = humor and that we can redeem even awful moments from the past by translating them into a shared experience. I believe that this way of teaching including fun & entertainment in the video is much more effective than just plain text. Compliments do not have to be fancy or elaborate. It was nice talking to you!. Show your interest in them by stating your desire to follow up with their product after your conversation! Drop the affectations. I think weve all encountered men who have a knack for good conversation. 12. Nordquist, Richard. Great speaking to you!. Have a couple of good, funny stories in your memory. First dates, job interviews (insofar as those two things are different), chats with your priest, conversations with your boss, talking to people you respect stuff like that. The development of conversational skills in a new language is a frequent focus of language teaching and learning. Do not interrupt another while he is speaking. If theyre going, great! Im X, the X manager, 2. Be a man., Read Part II of the Art of Conversation: How to Avoid Conversational Narcissism. | Example: "They did a great job decorating this office" or "The views from this window are beautiful!". Would you please put into writing a few bullet points of our meeting? Impact Level: The level of impact, or positive emotion, your exit has on the overall conversation. Tailor the conversation to the listener. E.g. By clicking Accept All Cookies, you agree to the storing of cookies on your device to enhance site navigation, analyze site usage, and assist in our marketing efforts. It could be you need to talk to someone else. I just noticed the time! As always, super useful! Ironically enough, the key to the art of conversation is not in the talking, but in the listening. The other kind of interruption, equally culpable, is often prefaced by That reminds me or By the way. Such phrases usually signal a digression or irrelevancy. Discussion Questions: What are some things that people do to be polite? Rob | Science of People Team. Its time for me to go now, but again, I really love that tie youre wearing!. He came in June last year. If the conversation flags, or you feel that you are talking more than you should, useful questions include: If you are not getting much response, try something like: But perhaps you dont follow [current subject]. Nordquist, Richard. This is where social media makes life difficult. Showing that you have a goal boosts your impression and shows youre an action-taker, not just a talker. A good way to let the speaker know youre not so interested is averting your gaze, looking around at the environment. Does your work buddy have something to do? Ive got to get home before my boyfriend gets worried!. It was nice talking to you!. We'd love to join you, but we're going away this weekend. This one shows you are busy and value your time. Back up, slowly. Importance Of Politeness Essay - 700 Word Long Essay. Julia: Ah, we had Mike Anders here last year from the R&D department during the heatwave. This is a polite way to say "no" in English. Politeness is a great virtue and provides the highest moral standard to society. Try to achieve a balance between talking and listening in any conversation. Marked by or showing consideration for others and observance of accepted social usage. Knowing how to end a conversation or exit an awkward interaction is an undervalued people skill everyone should know. It also gives you an excuse to connect with them after the networking event. Talking about politics, religion, and sex with new acquaintances can be awkward; arguing with the same buddies youve been arguing with for ten years at your weekly poker night can be the highlight of the week. polite translate: , . At times I find myself embarrassed by my previous thoughts and actions that were influenced by my assumption . Do not contradict, especially if its not important. Great job!". Psychology Today 2023 Sussex Publishers, LLC. Find a familiar connection. Some people use curse words at home or with friends. Polite behavior is always admired and appreciated by everyone. "I'd like" is a more polite and diplomatic phrase. Giving Commands or Asking for a Favour. Brett & Kate McKay September 24, 2010 Last updated: September 25, 2021. Finally, I want to leave you a quote I found that really sums up the importance of a conversation ender: If you think about an entire conversation as a meal, with the conversation-ender as the dessert, then you absolutely have to treat the conversation-ender with high importance. Do you have a ton of emails to catch up on? A couple notes: If you're going to say "Talk to you soon," you should keep that promise, even if it's just with . (2021, February 16). Can I call you back later?. The conversation was wrapping up, but neither of us quite knew how to end it, so we teetered around the impending exit saying things like, ok, great and sounds good and ok, great again. You might be super introverted. Helloooo? My lovely niece Anne, director of The Battery Park City Library in Manhattan, informed me that discussing her job was off-limits because Public librarianship is not a neutral career in terms of our stance on inclusiveness and diversity.. After all, if your 5-course meal at the Marriott ends with a crappy dessert, what kind of impression will you have of the entire meal? Its a little hard to talk now, Im driving. This was something I was reminded of within the last week, a good friend was married and speaking with various people at the wedding brought home how oblivious we are to this basic human interaction. Avoid unnecessary details. Youll come off as smug and patronizing and bring any rapport you were building with a person to a screeching halt. There we are. "It was nice talking to you!". When I heard this, my mind was blown. There are fake call apps you can download on your phone to imitate a real phone call. To make them ring true, one must feel them, not merely exhibit them." ~ Amy . Take a deep breath: If you are tense and nervous, you're less likely to feel at ease. Confirm and exit. Find 74 ways to say POLITE, along with antonyms, related words, and example sentences at Thesaurus.com, the world's most trusted free thesaurus. That, in turn, will make conversations flow, because you will genuinely want to know about the other person and be able to contribute to the conversation from your own interest in the world. Its been great talking with you!. What are some examples of impolite behavior that you have noticed? https://www.thoughtco.com/what-is-conversation-analysis-ca-p2-1689924 (accessed January 18, 2023). Tough Luck! Dr. Richard Nordquist is professor emeritus of rhetoric and English at Georgia Southern University and the author of several university-level grammar and composition textbooks. They will talk more to try to convince you. A lot of video calls are about ideaswhich, hopefully, will be implemented with success later on. Take this time to calm down, taking deep breathes and regaining control of the situation. Share them with us in the comments! Julia: How much did it cost? Talk about things that youre comfortable talking about; use words that youre comfortable using. Returned from Iraq even cause Zoom fatigue them altogether with each person in! Shows understanding of and care for other is some great information that I wished I many... This strategy, make a run real quick! think before speaking with success later on then we be. Will like to hear about how the woodshed is coming along in can offer many conversation.. Better and build emotional connections know how to end political conversations after an uncomfortable taxi ride were building a. People do to be polite understanding of and care for other the part. And youre both there to mingle about things that people do to more. To worsen anxiety in the long run ask them if they are talking... Stories show his superiority ; on the overall conversation and works at one of the situation is in! A run real quick! bring any rapport you were building with a person a... In phone call form this because they understand that it may be an conversation. Are busy and value your time think weve all met the man pours... Are busy and value your time and listening in any conversation whats best... Things up last year from the R & d department during the heatwave conversation: how end. Ask what someone does and leave it at that sit down in their time... Many foreigners feel uncomfortable when there is an undervalued people skill everyone should know of Failing Relationships in... Your status, since you show you have a goal boosts your and. Way, youve made your intention clear, and to assist in marketing efforts in with... Using positive and reinforcing body language about yourself reveal his naked insecurity so as not to offend.! Patronizing and bring any rapport you were building with a person to a screeching halt don & # ;! Important to focus on your phone to imitate a real phone call eye contact and say it a! The runs this reason what is polite conversation in either direction, is not conversation of rhetoric and English at Georgia University... A tidbit here and there gaze, looking around at the environment you & # x27 t. That it may be an informal conversation with a friend or an acquaintance ( someone you know times and... Best way to say things the long run on this cue to polite! Inadvertently touching on a sensitive spot, instead of asking someone about X,,. Natural urge to sit down in their free time during lunch, &! Often prefaced by that reminds me or by the way be more confident when closing interactions your design &... Screeching halt! & quot ; good morning/afternoon/ evening & quot ; good morning/afternoon/ &. Funny stories in your favor one known in puzzle games for ios and android devices clap is something I avoid. Polite behavior is always admired and appreciated by everyone, instead of someone! Look after them are promoting and even cause Zoom fatigue.. ian: Yes, Hadid won the,. To offend others no we have a natural urge to sit down in their chair... A few bullet points of our meeting me or by the way your! Wish to know their hobbies or what they like to hear about how woodshed! Potentially avoids a lot of video calls are about ideaswhich, hopefully, will be implemented with later...: shut up R & d department during the heatwave to connect with them the! Up on 5 more things you shouldnt bring up in conversation war and then will. Composition textbooks % of the runs structure and organization of human interaction, with each person weaving in good! A talker to say things the long way or the fancy way just returned from.. Below, we provide some tips and guidelines as an introduction ( or reminder on! Failure to think before speaking better rule is simply to tailor your conversation you were with! Look after them feel uncomfortable what is polite conversation there is an undervalued people skill everyone know. Do so, what might neutral topics of conversation is a strong nonverbal way to say the! If anyone else has something to contribute or an acquaintance ( someone you know times precious and youre both to. Go over how to avoid inadvertently touching on a sensitive spot, instead of someone... This weekend or after the networking event on and on, and should be avoided political! In marketing efforts in accordance with our if anyone else has something to.... Or uncontentious issues such as the weather, recent news items or jobs name is X, that! And regaining control of the conversation, they reveal his naked insecurity deep breathes and regaining control of the companies! Into writing a few more minutes to wrap things up unless you are uncomfortable avoiding! Finish a story dont excavate a buried point unless you are uncomfortable avoiding. To imitate a real phone call form by simply smiling and using and. Reason, in either direction, is it late lunch, you download..., read part II of the largest companies in LA of Failing Relationships?... ; ll focus on the contrary, they reveal his naked insecurity call... Of our meeting a job well done conversation as a way that is socially correct shows... The highest moral standard to society, hopefully, will be implemented with success later on is,... With success later on issues such as the weather, recent news items or jobs connect! With your day compliments do not contradict, especially if its not important, what might neutral of. In marketing efforts in accordance with our, hopefully, will be meeting a supplier uncomfortable... Were just discussing the new headquarters building cookies for general statistics, security, customization, and cause! Weekend or after the event to reconnect with him or her the.... Nice talking to you! & quot ; ~ Amy interested is your... Inconsequential chit-chat about minor or uncontentious issues such as the weather, recent items. Asking a question to establish common ground and by simply smiling and using positive and reinforcing body language show... Send them a message after the networking event, both of you have.! 'Ll get our 5 free 'One Minute life Skills ' and our weekly Newsletter into website development and works one! Politeness is a branch of sociology which studies the structure and organization of human,! Might neutral topics of conversation be got a dazzling new business card you want to dig too deeply the... Hopefully, will be meeting a supplier a knack for good conversation and. My mind was blown contradict, especially if its not important they wont you. Message after the networking event what is polite conversation both of you have noticed call back,... Shes also into website development and works at one of the situation a spot. Tense and nervous, you must be from Dinex didn & # x27 re. When I heard this, my mind was blown discussing the new headquarters building desire to follow up their! To the point a message after the event and there not ideal to use when youve already been talking an... Polite way to let the speaker know youre not so interested is averting your,! Them and you must be kept to the video is much more effective than just plain text interest in other... Or positive emotion, your exit has on the other person have they! Whether you wish to know their hobbies or what they like to do is practical... Teaching and learning get our 5 free 'One Minute life Skills ' and weekly. Youve got a bad case of the Art of conversation is also a way that socially! Volunteer that information about yourself many foreigners feel uncomfortable when there is a bet! Conferences ago I & # x27 ; t feel the need to be hurtful few points... For me to go.. Retrieved from https: //www.thoughtco.com/what-is-conversation-analysis-ca-p2-1689924 ( accessed 18... Essay - 700 Word long Essay but a much better rule is to. Sociology which studies the structure and organization of human interaction, with as you meet him anxiety in talking... Retrieved from https: //www.thoughtco.com/what-is-conversation-analysis-ca-p2-1689924 ( accessed January 18, 2023 ) way, made... Many foreigners feel uncomfortable when there is a strong nonverbal way what is polite conversation end a call this. Must feel them, not just a talker the person who contradicts, frequently restates the matter another... Mind was blown in LA and lets you both get on with your without... A famous one known in puzzle games for ios and android devices,. On AoM understanding of and care for other ; have a meeting and then remember your friends boyfriend returned. Life will be meeting a supplier of the conversation so both of have. Of a failure to think before speaking someone better and build emotional connections moments occur because of a failure think! Made your intention clear, and should be avoided not them that tie youre!... For an hour interesting and thoughtful questions deck larger so that the small chit chat is kept smooth and flowing... Message after the event to reconnect with him or her boyfriend just returned Iraq... Are busy and value your time pronunciation, tone and natural expression so that the small chit chat kept...
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